Over the last week or so, I've had a couple people ask me questions related to wedding ettiquette and procedures. To bring the gift? or mail it? Can I give a toast even though I'm not the best man? If my boyfriend/girlfriend or child's name is not on the invitation, can they still attend? These are all great questions, and for many people these "wedding do's and don't" are still new. I thought I would spend a week covering all of the bases. So, here goes...
Day 1:
So you've Been Invited...
Who's actually invited?
The envelope with the invitation tells you who is invited. If it has only your name, then only you are invited. If it says & guest, then you may bring a guest. If it says & Family, or states your children's names, then your children are invited. Sometimes you also might see adult reception on invites, which means - leave the kids at home!
The envelope with the invitation tells you who is invited. If it has only your name, then only you are invited. If it says & guest, then you may bring a guest. If it says & Family, or states your children's names, then your children are invited. Sometimes you also might see adult reception on invites, which means - leave the kids at home!
What to do about the gift?
Couples usually create a wish list or gift registry through several retailers. What's nice is that the retailer will maintain the list for the registrant and make sure that items are removed from the list as they are purchased, so there are no repeat gifts. This is why it is important to notify the retailer when purchasing an item off a registry. Also- remember that a registry is for your convenience and you are not limited to what is on the list. In fact, I think that creative, personal gifts are a much better choice.
How much to spend?
There is no rule, it is entirely up to you. Let your affection for the bride and groom and your budget be your guide.
When to give the gift?
It is best to mail the gift to the couple that way the bride & groom do not have to worry about what to do with the gifts after the reception. Most likely there will be a table at the reception if you must bring it. And what's nice for you procrastinators is that you can send it after the wedding as well (try to send it within 3 months though). Also, If you're not planning on attending the wedding it is still good ettiqute to send a gift. Sending a gift indicates your support and best wishes for the happy couple who are starting their lives together.
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